Cultivating a beginner's mindset as a mom, wife, fashion marketer and now blogger!

LIFE APPRENTICE 101

It is still too early to see our results as parents, but the truth is that we are doing it differently from how we were raised. Partly because circumstances and the environment have changed, and partly because we have made the decision to make changes in raising our children.



Undoubtedly, the way of seeing life and facing the challenges of the generation known as Millennials is not the same as their parents and probably will not be the same of their children when they reach their age.


FAMILY

It is not only parenthood that is changing, but values ​​and the concept of family. We see family structures that were unthinkable when we were kids. Mom and dad working, Parents who have decided to stay at home to take care of their children, single mothers many times by choice, among many others.


RESPONSABILITIES

Although we live in more hectic day to day and with more stress, contrary to what is believed, Millennial parents seem to spend more time with their children. And the role of the Father is increasingly participatory in everything related to children, giving great validity to the term "co-parenting". Studies conducted by Boston College have found that 85% of millennial dads want to spend as much time with their children as possible and see it as a priority.


AUTHORITY

Millennial parents are mostly focused on positive parenting where communication is reinforced, leaving aside the vision of an authoritarian parenthood. It is done! because I say so ... apparently it is something of the past. Towars a parenthood phylosophy that seeks to reinforce positive behaviors instead of punishing negative ones.


MORE QUALITY TIME

New vision of timeshare, where it is not the amount that we can dedicate to our children, but the quality of those moments. Always focused on creating family memories that last over time, especially on weekends when the schedule allows it and not necessarily at dinner time as we were used to. Memories that are also shared on social media, with friends and family, as a means of communication.


Definitely, many of the changes have been the result of the natural characteristics of this generation, as well as the influence of great technological development, the internet, social media platforms and access to a lot of information.


Not forgetting that they are becoming parents at an older age. In 2017, in the United States, according to the National Center for Family & Marriage Research at Bowling Green University, the average age for women to have their first child is 26.8 years, compared to 1970 when the average age was 21.4 years.


Until a few years from now we will not know how positive changes have been, have these children been rewarded too much even when they have not reached the goal set?

What will they be like as adults on a personal and professional level? They are answers that only time will tell ...

Es muy pronto aún para ver nuestros resultados como padres, pero lo cierto es que lo estamos haciendo distinto a como nos criaron a nosotros. En parte porque las circunstancias y el entorno han cambiado, y por otra parte porque hemos tomado la decisión de hacer cambios en la crianza de nuestros hijos.




Sin duda la manera de ver la vida y de enfrentar los retos de la generación conocida como Millenials no es la misma que la de sus padres y probablemente no será la misma que la de sus hijos cuando lleguen a su edad.


LA FAMILIA

No es solo la crianza lo que está cambiando, sino los valores y el concepto de familia. Vemos estructuras familiares que antes eran impensables. Mamá y papá trabajando, Padres que han decidido quedarse en casa al cuidado de sus hijos, madres solteras muchas veces por decisión propia, entre muchos otros.


DIVIDIR RESPONSABILIDADES

Si bien vivimos en un día a día más agitado y con más estrés, contrario a lo que se piensa, los papás Millenials parecen dedicar más tiempo a compartir con sus hijos. Y el rol del Padre es cada vez más participativo en todo lo relacionado con los niños dándole gran validez al término “co-parenting”. Estudios realizados por Boston College’s han encontrado que 85% de los papás millenials desean compartir el mayor tiempo posible con sus hijos y lo ven como una prioridad.


RELACIÓN CON LA AUTORIDAD

Los padres Millenials están mayormente enfocados en una crianza positiva donde se refuerza la comunicación, dejando a un lado a esa visión de padre autoritario e impositivo. Se Hace porque lo digo yo… al parecer es algo que está quedando en el pasado. Hacia una crianza que busca reforzar las conductas positivas en lugar de castigar las negativas.


CALIDAD VS. CANTIDAD

Nueva visión del compartir tiempo, donde no es la cantidad que podemos dedicarle a nuestros hijos, sino la calidad de esos momentos. Siempre enfocados en crear recuerdos que perduren en la familia, especialmente los fines de semana cuando la agenda lo permite y no necesariamente al momento de la cena como estábamos acostumbrados. Recuerdos que además son compartidos en redes sociales, con amistades y familiares, como un medio de comunicación.


Definitivamente muchos de los cambios han sido producto de las características nata de esta generación, así como de la influencia del gran desarrollo tecnológico, el internet y las redes sociales, teniendo acceso a mucha información.


Sin olvidar que son padres a una mayor edad. En 2017, en Estados Unidos según el National Center for Family & Marriage Research at Bowling Green University, la edad promedio en que la mujer tiene su primer hijo es a las 26.8 años, comparado con 1970 cuando la edad promedio era de 21.4 años.


Hasta dentro de unos años no sabremos qué tan positivos han sido estos cambios, se han premiado demasiado a estos niños incluso cuando no han alcanzado el objetivo planteado?

Cómo serán como adultos a nivel personal y laboral? Son respuestas que solo el tiempo lo dirá...

Emotions are undoubtedly an essential part of our day to day, and part of our maturity. As we understand and manage them, the better decisions we will make in our lives and the more successful we will be in our different roles.


This is what experts call emotional intelligence, and it is not linked to our knowledge at an academic level. That is why we can be very successful professionals but with a low level of emotional intelligence.


It is important that from a very young age we explain these issues to our children and talk about emotions. Of course, being a very abstract topic, it must be introduced progressively.


In this way we will be giving them the tools to be assertive adults. No matter how advanced we are in our emotional intelligence, we will always have a presence of all emotions within us, but the way we deal with them is what will differentiate us from the rest.



The ideal panorama is to start in a playful way by talking about emotions. Tools such as stories and songs are ideal to attract the attention of our little ones and promote their interest.


The goal is for them to be able to learn about the different emotions, differentiate them and even identify them. I still remember the first time my two-year-old daughter told me Mom! I'm angry! ... I felt immense happiness, not only because she was verbally expressing what she felt but she also was sharing it with me ...


With all the pleasure in the world, I replied in a calm tone, ¨… I understand perfectly, and it seems fine to me, it is normal that sometimes to feel angry and sad.


In many cultures we are used to thinking and communicating to our children that they should not cry, that they cannot fight, that they cannot be sad. But the truth is that it is normal that in some occasions we dont feel great or happy, the important thing is that we can express it correctly, without hitting, biting or yelling.


Another key point is to provide our little ones with options that make it easier for them to calm down. Undoubtedly, if for us as an adult it is not always easy to be able to control ourself in a moment of anger, imagine how hard is for our children, who live each emotion to the maximun.


In an ideal world, your child would tell you mom I'm upset, I'll take a few minutes to process what's happening to me. But this is not real, so returning to reality, I share some of the tricks and tips that I use with my daughter at the time of -crisis-. ( of course each child is different, so experiment and get what works best for them, taking into account the age of your)


· Calm Jar, We love it at home, because it calms not only our daughter but us. Here is a DIY recipe. Ideally, explain them that they should shake it with great force when they feel anger, helplessness, sadness and then breathe and wait until the glitter returns to the bottom, and they are able to see again their fingers through the Jar.


· Books, There are many options. My daughter loves this one.


· FlashCards de emociones, ideal to learn vocabulary related with emotions.

Let's not forget that Monkey See, Monkey Do so let's lead by example and begin as parents to work on our emotional intelligence.

  • Black Instagram Icon
This site was designed with the
.com
website builder. Create your website today.
Start Now